Eclectic Waters

Archive for June, 2009

I had the best dream last night. It was vivid and when I woke up I was sure it was real, but it was too astounding to be real.

I was on the Logos II deck and we were at sea. A couple people were jumping off the side of the ship and then climbing back on. I was giving a lady and her husband a tour of the ship as it was their first time on board. Suddenly in the wave rolling towards the ship there was a giant shark far below the surface and I shouted and told her to look. It was majestic and huge. The people in the water quickly climbed back on board.

Next there was a huge stingray that jumped and flew through the air close to the railing and then slapped its body on the water. As I watched it land, I realized that the water was teeming with fish, a huge school of fish filled each wave and the water sparkled clear. Then the lady touched my shoulder and said “Look!”, pointing up and there were the backs of whales rising above the water like mountains, just a couple of meters from the ship.

Then Toby Jarrett said that we didn’t need to worry because the only time boats collided with whales was head on and these ones were swimming next to us.

My heart was filled with joy and wonder, just taking in the awesomeness of the view and feeling completely safe and peace, awed by the majestic beauty.

And then I woke up…

On my way to Cabo in the morning

should have been in bed a long time ago… but got puttering and talking to a friend

once again God used my experience of being previously engaged…

this time to a guy I was seeing who’d I’d met online and hung out with three times…

so cool

i love that God doesn’t waste our pain

i won’t be seeing the guy again as we agreed the timing is off and he is very recently dis engaged – but it was so cool to see God set up our meeting and use him in my life and me in his life..

if you think of me – pray for me while i’m in cabo

one of those conversations that is gifted to you at the right moment – and as the other person speaks, they answer a question you had not yet had the words to voice.

Carolyn arrived early for small group and began to share insights she was learning from a book she just picked up Just Courage by Gary Haugen.

These last days, as the time to depart for Cabo draws near, have found restlessness and worry circling my inner country, and I have felt dangerously out of my league at work, in my writing and in my perception of preparedness for Cabo.

The wisdom that came from Carolyn’s mouth, kicked up by this book, and from the rest of our small group tonight, taught me:

It is not about being strong and together; it is about depending on God in the midst of my fear and inadequacy.

In the gospels, Jesus did not show the disciples how capable they were; he brought them into situations where their complete lack and utter dependence on God, on Him, were revealed.

The storm pushing the sides of the ship as the expereinced fishermen believe they will die.

Jesus calms the storm.

Send the crowds away, teacher. They are hungry. Jesus looks at his disciples, You feed them.

With what? they reply.

Jesus feeds the multitudes.

Again and again Jesus reveals that He is enough; He is all. It is in Him that we live and breathe and have our being..

I needed tonight’s conversation and the honest questions and searching – reminding ourselves of scripture, of Jesus – who we serve, who He is – the God who defeated death, healed the lame… and holds me and my world in the palm of His hand…

Trust is not as far away as it was earlier today

and it’s neighbors hope and faith are drawing near.

In tonight’s conversation, I felt myself refueled and ready to move forward despite the trembling of my heart.

In waiting we begin to get in touch with the rhythms of life – stillness and action, listening and decision. They are the rhythms of God. it is in the everyday and the commonplace that we learn patience, acceptance and contentment.

have i mentioned i love my sisters, both of them

so different from each other

and from me -

and yet their

words

love

laughter

tears

stories

touch

surrounds me and I am thankful!

They bring life to me.